Snips and Snails? As If....

Having two boys, I have become more accustomed than I ever dreamed with the world of boys, bodily functions, fluids and sounds.

If you are currently pregnant with a boy, you better hang on.

It's a good thing I sell Scentsy, because y'all, the amount of pooting that has happened in my house lately is insane. One might think I am serving nothing but beans and rice for the symphony of sounds, but they would be wrong. Seriously, if I could get rid of any aspect of boy life, it would be the pooting issue. I loathe it.

And if it is not pooting or armpit farts or burping that I'm dealing with, it's seasonal allergies and lots and lots of snot.

On the way to school yesterday I heard Jackson sniffing in the backseat. I asked him if he needed a tissue to blow his nose. His response, "No thank you. I already sneezed this morning and it shot out like a snot rocket."

Nice.

Forget snips and snails and puppy dog tails, my boys are made out of snot rockets and armpit farts, and I wouldn't trade them for anything!

To Be 5.9 Years Old Again...

Jackson has been hilarious with some of the stuff he's coming up with lately. You never quite know what is going to come out of his mouth. The funniest part? He's got a way of nailing inflection and tone, and it's becoming pretty obvious that he listens to everything that we say!

This is just a recap of some of the his sayings lately, a record for posterity, and also for me to file away in my memory and use against him one day!

"I would love to know what dog dropped that bomb in our front yard."

"I've decided that girlfriends are way too much trouble. I'm just going to wait for a wife."

"There is NO way that I'm ever kissing a girl. That is so gross!"

"I'm totally going to play T-ball in the Olympics one day!"

"Someone needs to teach Anderson not to poop in his diaper. That smells terrible. Also, he doesn't need to throw his food off of his highchair anymore. It's not polite."

"My friend at school, _______, has been saying not nice things to me at school. He's calling me things like poopy head, and other stuff that isn't appropriate for my ears."

"I'm just about ready for school to start, and I'm completely ready to ride the school bus." (I hate to break it to him, but the school bus is not happening!)

"Someone, not me, but someone, destroyed my bedroom. I think it was Anderson."

And my personal favorite, "You're the best Mama ever in the whole wide world, and I love you to the moon and back! I love you more than rutabegas!"

Recap in 60

Last game of T-ball tonight.

Jackson has done amazing.

Hot as Hades.

Anderson is a trooper.

Coach pitch next spring.

School starts in 25 days.

Got our 1^st choice teacher!

Now time for school supplies and clothes.

Disney in 41 days!

Air conditioner broke.

Hot as Hades again.

Air conditioner fixed.

Thank you, Jesus!

Olympics start tomorrow.

Go Team USA!

Truer Words Have Never Been Spoken

I saw this sign on the way home from T-ball last night and I couldn't resist pulling over and getting a picture. Too funny!

Praying For Aurora

I can't imagine what the family and friends of the victims of the shooting in Aurora, CO are going through, but they are in my constant thoughts and prayers. I pray that God gives them peace in the midst of such a tragedy. We don't understand why things like this happen in life, but I have to trust that God will allow good to come from such evil. God bless everyone involved...

"The LORD is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those who are crushed in spirit."Psalm 34:18 (NLT)

50 Questions

1. When you looked at yourself in the mirror today, what was the first thing you thought?

I need better moisturizer.

2. How much cash do you have on you?

Do pennies count? If so, I have about $0.15 cents.

3. What’s a word that rhymes with DOOR?

floor

4. Favorite planet?

I'm pretty fond of Earth!

5. Who is the 4th person on your missed call list on your cell phone?

Jeremy.

6. What is your favorite ring tone on your phone?

I'm boring and don't have a fun ring tone.

7. What shirt are you wearing?

A red fitted tee.

8. Do you label yourself?

Not usually.

9. Name the brand of the shoes you’re currently wearing?

Blue fin.

10. Bright or Dark Room?
Dark.

11. What is your favorite color car?

Blue.

12. What does your watch look like?

I don't wear a watch, and haven't in years. If I lose my cell phone I'm seriously messed up on time.

13. What were you doing at midnight last night?

Sleeping.

14. What did your last text message you received on your cell say?

Let me know when you are done.

15. Where is your nearest 7-11?

We don't have 7-11's around here.

16. What's a word that you say a lot?

No (I have two kids and a dog)

17. Who told you he/she loved you last?

Jeremy.

18. Last furry thing you touched?

Macy, our Irish setter.

19. Favorite reality TV show?

Currently Gator Boys, Call of the Wildman and Wipe Out.

20. How many rolls of film do you need developed?

I have several rolls that need developed, and I'm really bad about not printing pictures.

21. Favorite age you have been so far?
25 was a pretty good year.

22. Your worst enemy?

Carbs.

23. What is your current desktop picture?

A family picture.

24. What was the last thing you said to someone?

"Hi!"

25. If you had to choose between a million bucks or to be able to fly what would it be?

At this point in life, a million bucks would be much more useful. 

26. Do you like someone?

Yes. Duh.

27. The last song you listened to?

I listen to talk radio these days.

28. What time of day were you born?

I think I was a morning baby.

29. What’s your favorite number?

8.

30. Where did you live in 1987?

Prattville, AL.

31. Are you jealous of anyone?

Nah. Doesn't do any good.

32. Is anyone jealous of you?

Not that I know of!

33. Where were you when 9/11 happened?

On the campus of Auburn University, standing right outside Jordan-Hare Stadium.

34. What do you do when vending machines steal your money?

Say bad words in my head.

35. Do you consider yourself kind?

Yes.

36. If you had to get a tattoo, where would it be?

I have one, a Jesus fish on my right foot, and I would love another one, just not sure where.

37. If you could be fluent in any other language, what would it be?

Chinese or Spanish.

38. Would you move for the person you loved?

Yes.

39. Are you touchy feely?

No.

40. What’s your life motto?

Love God...Love People

41. Name three things that you have on you at all times?

A cell phone, my wallet and keys.

42. What’s your favourite town/city to visit?
I love the beach.

43. What was the last thing you paid for with cash?

Field trip for Jackson to go to the movies with his daycare.

44. When was the last time you wrote a letter to someone on paper and mailed it?

Can't even remember...

45. Can you change the oil on a car?
Negatory.

46. Your first love: what is the last thing you heard about him/her?

Married with a child. Doing well.

47. How far back do you know about your ancestry?

I heard one time that my Aunt traced my family on my Dad's side back to Lady Godiva.

48. The last time you dressed fancy, what did you wear and why did you dress fancy?

Formal night on a cruise, black dress and strappy heels.

49. Does anything hurt on your body right now?

I have a headache. I always have a headache.

50.  Best food ever?
Japanese food!

Feel free to do the 50 Questions Meme and then comment with a link. I would love to know your answers!

Wordless Wednesday

50 Days From Today!

50 days from today we will be heading to Walt Disney World! We are so excited! This will be the first trip for Jeremy and Jackson, and I haven't been to the Magic Kingdom in 20 years. I'm 99.9% sure that we have settled on spending 2 days at Magic Kingdom and 1 day at Hollywood Studios for this trip, with an excursion to Epcot for dinner on our first night. We have meal reservations at Crystal Palace, Garden Grill and the Spirit of Aloha luau show. Because this is a birthday present for Jackson, he will get to wear a "Birthday Boy" button during the trip and can gets lots of special attention from cast members.

Jackson knows that we are going to Disney World after school starts, but what we haven't told him (SSHHH...it's a BIG surprise) is that we are flying there instead of driving. He has wanted to fly on an airplane forever, and after we scored some amazing rates, we opted for splurging just a little bit more and booking flights. We plan on telling him at his birthday party about the flights. I'm not good at keeping secrets, but I want to pull off a good surprise for him with this.

Keep the Disney tips coming! We're walking into this blind and I can use all the advice you can give me. Y'all take care!

I've Taught Him Well

Jackson: "Mama, do you know what I want to be when I grow up?"
Me: "Hmmmm...not sure. What do you want to be?"
Jackson: "You have to guess. It starts with an 'R'."
Me: (mind going blank) "I have no clue!"
Jackson: "A Republican!"

Now I just have to teach him the word "Conservative" and he'll be all set!

Weekly Confessions

It's been a crazy week around Wade's World. Busy, busy! We've been lucky to have some afternoon rain showers this week, but it rained out T-ball on Tuesday, and last night's game was questionable. We ended up playing and Jackson did great again! Here goes some confessions!

• I'm going to be an aunt again! Times two!! Jeremy's younger brother Ben, and his wife Lacey are expecting their first baby in January, and my sister Kellyn and her husband Jason are expecting their second baby in February. So excited for these new additions to our family! Jackson is beyond thrilled that he is getting 2 new cousins next year!

• I seriously hate the feeling of humming. The mmmm feeling on my lips drives me nuts. I won't sing songs that make me hmmm during the song. I'm crazy, I know...
• I had an allergic reaction to something yesterday and my top lip started swelling up. I looked like Kris Kardashian after collagen implants, but only on my top lip. I took a swig of Benadryl and all was better an hour or so later. I wish I could figure out what did it so it won't happen again.
• I had a crazy dream the other night that we were flying to Disney World, only it was in California, and the plane we were flying on was a hospital transport plane, and we had to sit around hospital beds while we were flying, and we had no idea who the sick people were. Then, when we got to the airport I realized that I hadn't packed anything like shampoo, deodarent or soap. Clearly I'm harboring that some deep seated fears that I'm having hygiene issues and fear that I'm not prepared for our trip. I need therapy!
• I ordered Jackson's birthday cake the other day. Thanks to a middle of August birthday, he's going to have an Olympics themed party and his cake is going to be so cute. I can't wait!
• Jackson has been in swim lessons this week and he's done so good! He has done so much better about putting his face into the water when he is swimming and his strokes are getting more defined. I was on swim team as a child and I'm super excited about Jackson learning the proper way to swim. He says he wants to be on swim team when he's bigger, so I guess we'll see!

That's it for today! Anything y'all need to confess?



Vote For Pratt Park!!

I need your help! Pratt Park in my home town is in the running to win a $100,000 grant from Coca-Cola to help put in a splash pad at the park. We desperately need your help in voting. We are flipping back and forth between first and second place right now, and the other park in the lead, Krull Park, in New York has been up to what seems like very shady voting practices. I'm going to stop short of saying that the Krullens are cheating, but that is exactly what I think! Those voting vampires are putting up upwards of 300,000 votes during the hours of midnight and 3am on some days, and other than using auto check in, which is against the rules, there is no way that they are legitimately racking up that many votes during the middle of the night.

So here's where I need your help: Pretty please, with a cherry on top, stop by VotePrattPark and help us vote. You can vote as many times during the day as possible for 1 vote each, and you can also link up your Four Square account through livepositively.com, and each of those votes (after the account is linked) will count for 100 votes. If you can do the foursquare voting, you can "check in" every 20 minutes up to 28 times a day and you will help us rack up 2800 votes which will really make a difference!

Please help me out by voting for Pratt Park!!!

Internet Gold

I’ve been completely messed up having Wednesday off, and my brain seems to keep thinking that it is Sunday. I’m so off! Here are some hilarious pics I’ve found on the internet recently and had to share. Enjoy!

Motherly Words Of Wisdom Needed

I know that part of my personality includes a quirk for worrying, but I need some advice:


Anderson isn't talking, and I don't know what to do.

He's almost 13 months old and he has no vocabulary. No "Mama" or "Dada",just nothing but, "Eh" which has earned him the nickname of "Caveman" around here.

Jackson walked and talked very early, and I know that each child is an individual, but it's hard for me to realize that Anderson is beyond a year old and not speaking at all. We read books to him, and we always talk to him to narrate what is going on. I'm not worried about his hearing because responds to things we say, (especially if he gets fussed at) and he looks at us when we are talking. Hearing is definitely not the problem. I brought this up to our pediatrician at his yearly checkup, and she wasn't concerned. She said we would follow up and see how he's doing at 15 months. That, my friends, is 2 months away, and I am sick of worrying about this.

Here are a few of my thoughts:

1. We know he has an issue with his upper frenulum that will be addressed in September, if not sooner. I don't think that is causing him to not speak, like it could if he were tongue tied and the frenulum was attached on the bottom.

2. Maybe he's not talking because Jackson talks so much, and he can't get a word in edgewise.

3. Maybe he's just stubborn and he knows that he's worrying me.

I know this may seem silly to some of you veteran mothers out there, but this business of him not speaking is really getting to me. And yes, I'm aware that I'll probably look back on this in a few months when he's talking up a storm and want to kick myself for not loving the quietness.

But for right now, this Mama needs some motherly advice or words of wisdom...

My Little Slugger

Jackson had his first T-ball game last night and he did amazing! He was first up to bat and he scored a home run on his first swing! I was so proud of him. He played pitcher during 2 innings last night, and was put in outfield during one inning. His made it to 3rd base the 2nd time he came up to bat, and then scored another homerun during his last time up to bat. I couldn't be more proud of him, and he had a great time.

This is going to be so much fun this season, and I'll post pictures and video soon. Y'all have a great weekend!

Stepping Onto My Rainbow Colored Soapbox

*Wade's World Disclaimer* If you are a Democrat or a Liberal, you might want to just move on and not read this post. You will not like it. Consider yourself warned. Comment moderation will be turned on for this post, and any comments that I deem rude or argumentative will be deleted without hesitation or apologies. I'm not like Fox News. I never claimed to be fair and balanced.*

Now stepping onto my soapbox.

I’m completely over the gay agenda.

I’m sick of being forced to “accept” alternative lifestyles.

I’m tired of politicians and celebrities cramming gay culture down America’s throat.

I’m done with companies that advertise by promoting homosexuality.

I  have PRIDE in being part of a traditional family. I will unashamedly say that I’m a Christian, and I believe that God designed marriage to be the union of a man and a woman, and nothing that anyone, including our fearless leader Obama, says will change that.  This is not an argument about gay lifestyle. What people choose to do in their personal life is their business, and I’m not in a place to judge that, but I definitely have a Biblical world view and I don’t agree with the decisions they are making. However, it seems like it has become the trendy and politically correct thing to do to “support” gay lifestyle. If a company wants to promote an issue, why can’t it be something worthwhile, like helping kids with disabilities, or promoting American pride and exceptionalism. Instead they pick an issue that does nothing but erode traditional family values just because it is a hot button issue right now.

Here are my thoughts:

Not that I was going to support him anyway, but Obama’s recent endorsement of gay marriage was nothing more than a desperate political ploy for votes by a floundering President, and it probably won’t help him much. Nor will it change anything because last time I checked, gay marriage is still a states rights issue (for now), and every single state that has had it come up for a statewide vote has voted it down. That alone should tell politicians that the American people do not support this issue, and kowtowing to a small group of citizens is a huge mistake.

Y’all, I’m heartbroken to say this, because I love JC Penney, but they have forever lost my business by their recent ads for Mothers Day and Fathers Day that highlighted gay couples with their children, as well as naming Ellen DeGeneres as their spokesperson. Why must businesses bring sexual orientation into advertising? Do they really think that the LGBT community are huge JC Penney shoppers, or is that the target market they are now shooting for, instead of average Joe families? How about JC Penney stick with their heritage of promote clothing, shoes, accessories and household goods at affordable prices and leave sexual orientation out of the advertising.

Mr. JC Penney himself was a devout Christian, and he would be rolling over in his grave if he knew how his successors were running his company, and I hope their business suffers as a result of their new advertising campaign.

And as if JC Penney’s stuff wasn’t hard enough for me to take, my Mom sent me an email the other day that said that my favorite cookie, Oreo, (produced by Kraft) has now jumped on the gay bandwagon by promoting their new “Pride” cookie. They aren’t actually selling the cookies, but just using it in advertising, which is bad enough.


It’s a sad day for me, but I think I’ve enjoyed my last Oreo, and I will also avoid Kraft products. I just don’t see the point of centering all advertising towards one “market” and completely alienating everyone else by using an issue that is so clearly divisive. Why not release a red, white and blue Oreo in time for July 4th and promote American pride to bring people together? Why did they have to go with the rainbow pride? If the LGBT community is their new niche, I wish them luck as they circle the drain.

It’s definitely not my intention to stir up a debate about gay people. This isn't about gay people. Like I said before, I don't agree with that lifestyle, but I don't make a scene about it either. I just don't want it shoved in my face every time I turn on the TV or pick up a catalog or magazine. I just don’t understand why a company that sells clothing and household goods and another company that sells cookies need to bring sexual orientation into advertising. Both were good companies and don’t need to resort to such low standards in order to promote business. Because of their decisions, they have lost my support, and I doubt if I’m alone in that. I can’t, with a good conscience, give my money to a company that is blatantly supporting something that I so strongly disagree with.

If you don’t stand for something, you’ll fall for anything….

(Almost) Wordless Wednesday

Jackson running from 1st to 2nd during T-ball practice. I’m so glad my ball player is back home!

He’s Home!

Jackson got back home last night from his 9 day trip to Mississippi and I swear I could have squeezed him to pieces when he came in at 9 last night. I have missed that boy so much! It looks like he’s grown a foot since he left and he walked back in all tall and lanky. Where has my little boy gone?

Anderson is going to be super excited when he wakes up this morning. Heck, I’m so excited for the boys to see each other again that I’m wide awake at 5 in the morning. I’m tempted to make some commotion to wake everyone up, but I’m not stupid!

We have T-ball tonight and Jackson starts his games on Thursday. It’s going to be a crazy, busy week, but I’m so glad that Jackson is home and we’re back to normal!

I’ll catch back up with y’all tomorrow!

The Only Child

Anderson has been the only child in our since Saturday before last, when Jackson headed to Mississippi for 9 days. Jeremy will be picking Jackson up tonight after work in Demopolis, and we're so excited to have our big boy back home. He has had a blast visiting with his Mimi and Adam in Starkville, and Papa and Gigi in Hattiesburg, but 9 days is so long! Jackson has been so busy going to class at Mississippi State with his Uncle Adam, spending time with Mim and his cousin Cameron, and having a blast with Papa and Gigi since Wednesday. We're so thankful that Jackson has been able to spend some quality one-on-one time with Jeremy's family, and we can't wait to be able to do the same for Cameron when he is a little older.

Since Jackson has been gone, not much has changed for Anderson, except that he has gotten spoiled rotten from all the attention he's been getting.

He's still not walking.
He's still not talking.
He still prefers his bottle over his sippy cup.

Clearly, we've been lazy the past 9 days only having 1 child, but we're ready for life to be back to normal with our chatterbox back home. Tball resumes tomorrow, so we better hang on for a busy summer! Y'all have a great day!

Weekly Confessions

• My GPS has lost its mind this week. Once this week it told me to make a U-turn in 58 miles. Pretty sure I'm not doing that! It also gave me an ETA of 1 hour and 25 minutes for me to drive 44 miles. Clearly my GPS needs a vacation!
• I saw a girl this week with a barcode tattooed on her wrist. This is an assumption on my part, but I'm pretty sure she hasn't read Revelation.
• I saw another girl with a neon green shirt, about 4 sizes too small, that read, "You're Blinded By My Awesomeness." No, sweetie, I'm blinded by your shirt. And the fact that your beer belly is hanging out the bottom of your shirt.
• I try not to judge people, but if you have barcodes tattooed on yourself and wear shirts that are ridiciously small, you are inviting people to question your judgement.
• I'm having a Scentsy party tomorrow night at my friend Crystal's house. I'm super excited. If you need any Scentsy stuff, you can shop at www.amywade.scentsy.us!
• Anderson has gotten spoiled rotten this week being an only child. Jackson is going to have to help him back into reality when he gets home on Monday!

That's all for today. Hope y'all have a great weekend!

Crazy Week Around Wade’s World

• Jeremy and I met his sister and her hubbie (Amy and Adam) in Tuscaloosa on Saturday, where we swapped one chatterbox of a 5 year old into their car to spend the week in Mississippi. He’s in Starkville until Wednesday and then heading to Hattiesburg until next Monday. Our house is so crazy quiet right now, and I’m sure that Amy and Adam’s ear drums are bleeding from Jackson talking nonstop. Seriously, the ride back home from Tuscaloosa was the quietest our car has ever been. I miss Jackson like crazy, but he’s having a blast! He got to go to college yesterday (Mississippi State) with Uncle Adam who is a professor there. I heard he told Adam before they got there, “If you need to take a rest or something, I’ll be happy to watch the kids for you!”  He is such a fun little mess!
• Anderson is thriving on being the only child for the next week. He’s getting constant attention and will be spoiled rotten by the time Jackson gets home. It’s strange only having one child again, and since A’s not talking yet our house is super quiet!
• Jeremy and I finally stepped into the 21st century and got new cell phones. We have ended our contract with AT&T where we were on a dinosaur of a plan and had to pay 20 cents per text message. It wasn’t a problem for me since I never text, but Jeremy gets lots of texts about work stuff, and our bill was going up drastically. Now we have new Droid phones and we’re both just smitten. Being on a 3G network  and still having unlimited talk, text and web is something I can live with. I’m almost embarrassed to tell y’all this, but I’ve had my Sony phone since Jackson was 8 months old. I should win an award or something! It’s been a good phone, but clearly it’s done it’s time and should be laid to rest! I downloaded Draw Something, and I would love some new friends on there. Be warned: my drawings are terrible!

See y’all tomorrow!